you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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