On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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