Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize