she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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