I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Randomize
