Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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