Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
