you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
All the doctor said was why
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize