she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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