She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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