it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Randomize
