At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize