brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
