I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Randomize