We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Dignity is for republicans.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
