You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
