I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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