You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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