We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
