on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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