He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
