flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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