Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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