So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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