i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
