How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
