Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
