I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
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