Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
