i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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