I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Enjoy the penises
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
