That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
