Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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