is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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