And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
