It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Randomize
