Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize