i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Randomize
