just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
