we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Bring me that man meat
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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