Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize