OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
