life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
We are all done wearing pants today
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize