I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
