Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
