My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
So here I am, sexting at work.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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