i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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