she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize