Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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