ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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