Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
